I am SO tired tonight. This will be incredibly brief.
The chickens are finally beginning to lay with some regularity again!
All of the animals (well, most: the dogs, cat, & geese) are completely batty tonight due to the full moon. I'm dreading a night of many interruptions (to my sleep). I let them in w/in the past 15 minutes, and now they're already growling & yipping again, wanting to go out. Were it summertime, I'd just leave the front door open (there's a dog door in the screen door), and they could come & go as they pleased, all night long. These nights sure are absolutely gorgeous, but when the dogs don't sleep it invariably seems that I don't either. Hmph. Darn, wacky moon.
After taking care of The Peanut yesterday, I stayed on at her parents' house to partake in a family evening. Since her aunt and uncle and two girl cousins from St. Paul were visiting their cabin (on adjoining property) AND Nana and Papa were up, too, it was a night to be celebrated. Nana and Papa are my folks' age and were homesteaders up here back in the 70s, too. The Peanut's daddy, uncle, and auntie and I all grew up here together. And, since I've become Boppee to The Peanut, I've been fortunate enough to become an even closer member of their extended family.
On the down side, it was the first gathering since Tom and I have split - the first one for me to be attending solo. I did fine until about 7:30, 8:00. Because I had a relatively early morning today and an hour's drive home (followed by chores once I got here), I knew I needed to leave earlier than the rest, anyway, but very suddenly my social stamina was nearly gone. Not even the strong Myers' & Cherry Cokes I was downing could keep me goin'. Fortunately, everyone was pretty involved in going upstairs to watch a Minnesotan compete in the Olympics on TV, and so it was only The Peanut's mama who was savvy to my mood. I made it allllllmost to the door before the sobs got me. She (the mama) just held and held me (a feat in itself considering she's about 5'2" and 103 lbs. on a good day). Finally, I said, "I HAVE to leave!" The can't-possibly-hide-'em wails were right around the corner.
It wasn't until I was in the privacy of the truck that I realized the kitchen window might still have been open . . . and open to the sounds of my sobs. I'm still crossing my fingers, though, that it was closed by then and/or the sound from the TV would have kept my sadness from reaching the ears of everyone inside. I cried until I reached town (they live on the other side of town from the side I drive in to / out from). Only 10 minutes or so. But, obviously (!), I needed to get that out.
Going thru this . . . situation . . . between me and Tom, this break-up, has brought up some interesting social reactions (I guess you'd call 'em) for me. For example, the timing of when I cry and when I don't seems to be off. At least, 'off' from what I expected. I find myself in many situations, talking to friends & telling them what's going on, when I feel like I SHOULD be crying . . . but it's just not there. Instead, the emotion hits totally unexpectedly like it did last night or as soon as the "amen"s were said following the dinner blessing at dear friends' last Monday night.
Okay, that's kind of a downer to end on, but I think I'll be lucky to keep my eyes open long enough to stumble across the hallway to the bedroom. More tomorrow.